Not Even Pube Length

Usually, when you ask someone what they want for their birthday, they reel off an obscenely long list of all the things that they could only afford if they were to sell their virginity, their soul and their house (in that order). 

So, what does the girl who can afford almost anything want? 

Well, if Kylie Jenner is anything to go by, then the answer is: 

a patchy-ass buzz-cut.

I'm sorry, but whyyyyyyyyyy do girls do this? 

Cassie and Amber Rose (and anyone other females that suit a shaven head perfectly), I'll let you off but please, the majority of us are over here auctioning off our right arm to get our hair to grow back after a run-in with Edward Scissorhands at the hairdressers, and then there's the rest of the female population apparently googling "stereotypical lesbian hairstyles" for inspiration. 

I actually know a few people that shaved half (yes, half) of their head years ago and trust me, that shit has still not grown back. 

Not even pube length.

Ok, whatever, all I'm saying is this:

 if you really must make yourself look like a naked mole rat in a dress, please make a good job of it.
I don't know who shaved Kylie's head but I'm certain that neither guide dogs nor Specsavers were involved in the destruction of Kylie's (now patchy) hairline. 

And well, judging by the way things turned out, maybe they should have been...